If you've ever seen the movie, "The Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood," you'll know that it's about enduring friendships. It is also about a mother-daughter relationship and all of its ups & downs. I watched it recently, and have to admit that at moments in my life I could relate to both Vivi and Siddalee Walker...
On one hand, I feel like I'm "cracking up" like Vivi did when she was younger. The moment all of the kids were vomiting and had diarrhea and she stepped in the mess - I can almost relate to that only on a much smaller scale. On the other hand, there are issues in my life, from my childhood, that I am dealing with and I feel like I could write a book...
In one of the final moments of the film, a conversation takes place between Vivi & Sidda that just really speaks volumes to me about the relationship between a mother & daughter...
Vivi: I've been thinking about what I'd sayto you, should we ever speak again. I thought of all the mean things that'dmake you feel guilty. You know me. I take a problem and chew on it until all the flavor's gone... ...and then I stick it in my hair. And then it dawned on me.
All those years...
...that I prayed...
...that I begged on my handsand knees...
...for God to make me more, give me more...
...make me better...
...make me stronger...
...make me saner...
...make all my dreams come true...
I finally got an answer.
Sidda: What?
V: You.
Right there in one person,all I'd ever wanted to be or do.
And there you are.
You came right through me...
...and I never even realized.
I hate it when it's right in front ofyour face and you miss it. Don't you?
(minor conversation continues)
There's one more thing I want to ask.
Then you go dance until your socks melt.
Okay. But I want you to be totally honest.
S: Are you sure?
V: - Yes.
S:- Okay.
V: Do I look like I've gained weight?
S: No. Actually,I think you may be too thin.
V: God love you, darling.
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Goodness - I guess I'm really behind times...I'm just reading this for the first time today. I don't know which one of those women was the mama or daughter, but it was a very interesting conversation. Life is very interesting at times, isn't it?
My mom did the best she could...I tried to do my best, and now I get to watch my own kids struggle through life, as parents, and as children of their own parents. If we knew what a huge responsibility it was going to be...and how much we would influence our kids for their whole lives...would we have had children? Maybe not...so it's a good thing we don't know lots of 'stuff' ahead of time huh?
I love being a mom - especially love being a Nana, and pray everyday that God gives us wisdom and direction for those lives we touch, whether we live close or faraway.
God bless you dear Deb - sweet mommy of Claira Ruth. You're already much wiser in many ways, than I was at your age. Just do the best you can, but don't think you'll be able to get by without your own kids struggling as adults either. Struggling brings growth -just like the butterfly. Thankfully, He promises to work all things for our good. XO
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