I am one of those "all-or-nothing" people. I always have been. I prefer black and white to the whole idea of a grayscale. I prefer Yes or No, not Maybe. I want everything, or I want nothing.
This is a pervasive part of Perfectionism. Perfectionism is my very worst quality. It pushes me to achieve the impossible, to strive for the unattainable, and to think the worst of myself when I "fail." It addes to my sense of frustration and unhappiness with life, when in reality, I have everything I always wanted. I don't want to teach my daughter this impossible way of living. I have to root it out of myself and learn to be a Mary-in-a-Martha-world.
Always learning. Always growing. This is what I get for asking God to build character in me... =)
Thursday, August 31, 2006
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